Cultivating Your Child's Talent: Are you a Joe Jackson?

I would have never dreamed of being a divorcee, raising two boys.  I mean, when you're dreaming about your life -- I think most are idealistic about what the future will bring.  At least I was.  So here I am, a woman in my 40s, rebuilding my life and raising my, now 14 and 10-year-old sons.  When I tell you they have needs -- WOW.  Parenting is 24/7/365 -- multiply that by 100 when you're a single parent.  Back to these needs...  I have such a profound appreciation for the inexhaustable supply of love and support that my parents continue to give to my adult brother and I because it is WORK -- if you're truly committed.

My boys have their own unique personalities, perspectives and interests -- Take my youngest, he has a gift for baseball -- I find myself walking a fine line when it comes to cultivating his gift versus becoming the "Joe Jackson" in his life yelling, "Dance Michael!"  I had a heart to heart with him and said, if there ever comes a time that baseball is no longer fun for you, I want you to tell me and I will not force you to play. -- I know, sounds good right?  Well, the day came and I had to seriously think about what he may be throwing away and later, regretting.  He came to me in tears and said that he hated baseball and that he no longer wanted to play.  I dried his eyes and asked what was it about baseball that he didn't like --- he said, "it seems like it's the only thing that I get to do and I want to do something else."  I took a moment and asked him, if you added other activities, like a photography or painting class (all things that he loves) -- would you still want to stop playing baseball?  Surprisingly, he said no -- adding, baseball isn't the only thing that I'm interested in mom.  I am by no means an expert on parenting -- I'm learning each day with every new experience that my boys present.  However, I do believe this... sometimes, we, as parents, can make our kids hate the very thing that they love by cramming it down their throats.  I'd love to hear your thoughts and experiences with your own children.  We all learn from each other...  I'll introduce you to my first born in my next post...  High School is a trip!